| Mindless Musings |
07/31/2008
I realize now that trying to write lyrics with a contrived purpose before the music and melody are implied, leads to
rote and uninspiring results. Its better to wait. Possible phrases, word play, etc., may be executed and written
down. But, for me, to force a concept, a thought concrete, or emotional atmosphere is futile ( if not downright
frustrating ). This part of the creative process can be exhausting, especially when trying to hone in on a story or
direction. It can be a bit discouraging. Its the music that inspires me to write lyrics...not the other way around. This
was not always the case in the past. I have a hard time putting my ideas to trivial prose without a direct reaction to
melody and meter.
I realize now that trying to write lyrics with a contrived purpose before the music and melody are implied, leads to
rote and uninspiring results. Its better to wait. Possible phrases, word play, etc., may be executed and written
down. But, for me, to force a concept, a thought concrete, or emotional atmosphere is futile ( if not downright
frustrating ). This part of the creative process can be exhausting, especially when trying to hone in on a story or
direction. It can be a bit discouraging. Its the music that inspires me to write lyrics...not the other way around. This
was not always the case in the past. I have a hard time putting my ideas to trivial prose without a direct reaction to
melody and meter.
11/13/2008
Within the last few months, I have begun to seriously start recording and arranging some new music for my next
collection of songs. I have also joined a band called CHERRY as a bass player. I have never played bass in a
band situation before and it turned out to become a lot of fun ( which playing music should be right?...not always
the case with me ). It was sort of a strange thing. I showed up for an audition and was never really told that I
passed or made it. I guess it was assumed by all parties. The fact that I was invited to the official photo shoot a
couple weeks later, seemed to state that I was in the band. Its a bit of a musical departure for me. The songs are
current pop/rock stuff. So, I am learning quite a deal....and God forbid, I am really enjoying playing with other
people again. I love the fact that someone else ( ie. AJ ) is controlling all the strings and making things happen.
We should be playing in the coming new year and I am really looking forward to getting out there and performing
again. Raleigh has a great music scene...can't wait to sink my teeth into it all! With all the great ( and dramatic )
inspiration in my life, and the energy that is around me, as of now, this next "album" should be quite a journey. I
have some good solid compositions that even in their basic song form sound really worthy. I have begun drums
and bass on a few, getting my chops back to form ( oh, the horror! ). The majority, thus far, are mostly written on
piano. So, it will be interesting to see how the arrangements will turn out. What style? What angle? What
instruments? I love this part. Everything is in its ideal form. The vision has not yet been tainted by the
realisation.....( oh, the horror! )
Within the last few months, I have begun to seriously start recording and arranging some new music for my next
collection of songs. I have also joined a band called CHERRY as a bass player. I have never played bass in a
band situation before and it turned out to become a lot of fun ( which playing music should be right?...not always
the case with me ). It was sort of a strange thing. I showed up for an audition and was never really told that I
passed or made it. I guess it was assumed by all parties. The fact that I was invited to the official photo shoot a
couple weeks later, seemed to state that I was in the band. Its a bit of a musical departure for me. The songs are
current pop/rock stuff. So, I am learning quite a deal....and God forbid, I am really enjoying playing with other
people again. I love the fact that someone else ( ie. AJ ) is controlling all the strings and making things happen.
We should be playing in the coming new year and I am really looking forward to getting out there and performing
again. Raleigh has a great music scene...can't wait to sink my teeth into it all! With all the great ( and dramatic )
inspiration in my life, and the energy that is around me, as of now, this next "album" should be quite a journey. I
have some good solid compositions that even in their basic song form sound really worthy. I have begun drums
and bass on a few, getting my chops back to form ( oh, the horror! ). The majority, thus far, are mostly written on
piano. So, it will be interesting to see how the arrangements will turn out. What style? What angle? What
instruments? I love this part. Everything is in its ideal form. The vision has not yet been tainted by the
realisation.....( oh, the horror! )
01/01/2009
The thought of how much I miss a collaborator comes through more and more as these songs are coming to their
final “feel”. What may sound good to me, or God forbid quite interesting, may come off like total shit or boring as
hell, to someone else. Especially one, who is not in a particular zone to take in the songs as they were intended,.
So, two challenges arise:
1. To convey the “concept” properly through the music and lyrics.
2. To make the “concept” both musically and lyrically engaging enough to keep the interest of the listener.
This can be both distracting and enlightening. An artist who wants to connect with an objective audience must
provide some sort of personal vested interest on the part of the listener in which they can involve themselves in an
emotional, cathartic, cerebral, or intellectual way. This is where I feel a producer has his most valuable
responsibility. When producing ones self, you can attain total genius or complete self indulgence. The freedom of
not having someone curb or stifle your creative endeavours can be quite exhilarating. On the other hand, a
madman’s babbling sounds good and makes sense only to himself. When working in isolation, as I do, I become
the master of infinite space. And at the same time, certain things I’ve done over and over become uninteresting
quickly. But, with a second pair of ears, that performance may be better suited for what that song needs in context
(regardless of the 99 million times you played or said it that way before). Subjective creating has its good points.
The freedom, the total communication of vision and intent come across no holds barred.. And, I am a complete
believer in the theory that if it doesn’t sound good to the performer it sounds a 100 times worse to the listener.
The thought of how much I miss a collaborator comes through more and more as these songs are coming to their
final “feel”. What may sound good to me, or God forbid quite interesting, may come off like total shit or boring as
hell, to someone else. Especially one, who is not in a particular zone to take in the songs as they were intended,.
So, two challenges arise:
1. To convey the “concept” properly through the music and lyrics.
2. To make the “concept” both musically and lyrically engaging enough to keep the interest of the listener.
This can be both distracting and enlightening. An artist who wants to connect with an objective audience must
provide some sort of personal vested interest on the part of the listener in which they can involve themselves in an
emotional, cathartic, cerebral, or intellectual way. This is where I feel a producer has his most valuable
responsibility. When producing ones self, you can attain total genius or complete self indulgence. The freedom of
not having someone curb or stifle your creative endeavours can be quite exhilarating. On the other hand, a
madman’s babbling sounds good and makes sense only to himself. When working in isolation, as I do, I become
the master of infinite space. And at the same time, certain things I’ve done over and over become uninteresting
quickly. But, with a second pair of ears, that performance may be better suited for what that song needs in context
(regardless of the 99 million times you played or said it that way before). Subjective creating has its good points.
The freedom, the total communication of vision and intent come across no holds barred.. And, I am a complete
believer in the theory that if it doesn’t sound good to the performer it sounds a 100 times worse to the listener.
12/11/2008
I find myself struggling not to repeat myself as far as musical arrangements. I don't want to fall into the same
approach as I have before. I'm not looking to completely change my style. If, indeed, I have a style. Drums in
particular have been a bit of a thorn in my side. Perhaps, because I am least versed in playing that instrument and
am still learning. So, I search for musical inspiration. About nine months ago, I thought my next album would be a
“Van der Graaf Generator” - sounding effort ( dissonant, quirky, bordering on un-listenable ). But that was my
mood then. Things have changed… Oh my God, have they changed! Out of some dark clouds and confusing
moments, came a wonderful ray of sunlight that broke the clouds and now has become the very centerpiece, as
far as conceptually, of this next project. There is a spirit there…very strong. I hope that I can give a voice to its
awesome presence with respect and what it deserves. Oh, the pressure! LOL. Now, to influences at the moment:
October Project, Sigur Ros, Porcupine Tree rise to the top. These artists seem to best express what I’m trying to
convey. I am fortunate enough to have some solid songs. This is 75% of the battle. Some of the songs could be
just recorded with piano and voice ( the hallmark of a decent song ). But, I don’t feel I have a polished enough
voice to pull that off. Matthew Shelly suggested that I do that with some of my songs from Fay Ce Que Voudras
about a year and a half ago before it was all said and done. And that’s another thing. I haven’t written or recorded
anything from August 2007 to February 2008. I was spent creatively…well, at least, musically. I have been taking
my time with my latest efforts. Breathing them in, swirling them around my mouth, just trying to get my head around
some of the songs. But, as I said before, when the muse comes to visit…at least, spends the night….you
accommodate yourself to her. You obey. You do what she suggests. She never tells you what to do. She leaves
hints, sparks, small traces of brilliance which may become useful. She is fickle in a very sexy way. My plan was to
start on a concept ( “Divalia” from Fay Ce Que Voudras ) that would form into a story that would find its way into a
novel. But, alas, that is sent to the back burner of unfinished efforts and will have to wait its turn. So much has
happened since then. A change of mind, a different perception, a diversion in its most beautiful consummation. Its
so great to be alive! To feel the pain and pleasure that fate throws your way. I can only hope that I can transfer
that into my musical expression in a way that gives these feelings and experiences justice.
I find myself struggling not to repeat myself as far as musical arrangements. I don't want to fall into the same
approach as I have before. I'm not looking to completely change my style. If, indeed, I have a style. Drums in
particular have been a bit of a thorn in my side. Perhaps, because I am least versed in playing that instrument and
am still learning. So, I search for musical inspiration. About nine months ago, I thought my next album would be a
“Van der Graaf Generator” - sounding effort ( dissonant, quirky, bordering on un-listenable ). But that was my
mood then. Things have changed… Oh my God, have they changed! Out of some dark clouds and confusing
moments, came a wonderful ray of sunlight that broke the clouds and now has become the very centerpiece, as
far as conceptually, of this next project. There is a spirit there…very strong. I hope that I can give a voice to its
awesome presence with respect and what it deserves. Oh, the pressure! LOL. Now, to influences at the moment:
October Project, Sigur Ros, Porcupine Tree rise to the top. These artists seem to best express what I’m trying to
convey. I am fortunate enough to have some solid songs. This is 75% of the battle. Some of the songs could be
just recorded with piano and voice ( the hallmark of a decent song ). But, I don’t feel I have a polished enough
voice to pull that off. Matthew Shelly suggested that I do that with some of my songs from Fay Ce Que Voudras
about a year and a half ago before it was all said and done. And that’s another thing. I haven’t written or recorded
anything from August 2007 to February 2008. I was spent creatively…well, at least, musically. I have been taking
my time with my latest efforts. Breathing them in, swirling them around my mouth, just trying to get my head around
some of the songs. But, as I said before, when the muse comes to visit…at least, spends the night….you
accommodate yourself to her. You obey. You do what she suggests. She never tells you what to do. She leaves
hints, sparks, small traces of brilliance which may become useful. She is fickle in a very sexy way. My plan was to
start on a concept ( “Divalia” from Fay Ce Que Voudras ) that would form into a story that would find its way into a
novel. But, alas, that is sent to the back burner of unfinished efforts and will have to wait its turn. So much has
happened since then. A change of mind, a different perception, a diversion in its most beautiful consummation. Its
so great to be alive! To feel the pain and pleasure that fate throws your way. I can only hope that I can transfer
that into my musical expression in a way that gives these feelings and experiences justice.
04/23/2009
I haven’t blogged for the past 2 months because I’ve been busy doing what I’m blogging about…lol. I’m at the
process of musical layers and general arrangements in, what I hope, will be their final form. This sounds so damn
convoluted, I know. Unlike some of my more talented contemporary musicians, I take my time. I want to get to know
the song in its every detail and nuance. A mixture of intimacy, then separation. This keeps it fresh to my ears. I
can stand back and make good objective choices on the music. I have also spent this time with keyboards and
general ambience. Color and feel. Adding and subtracting performances to get the right balance. More vocal
ideas come to the forefront, especially backing vocals. A ‘call and response’ sort of thing, which I always love
hearing in other music. What has generally slowed down my productivity has been my computer that runs all my
keyboard, synth, and sampler programs that is out of commission due to a nasty-ass virus. I like to do my
performances live with as little editing as possible. I’ve been a slave to MIDI VST inputs on my main DAW for the
first time . Pushing the very limits of CPU. So, its been a bit of getting used to and I’m not sure I completely like it.
But, you got to work with what you have. Plus, this is how most producers / composers work anyway nowadays.
But, I’ve never been one to ride the crest of the latest and greatest procedures. Christ, it took me forever to
commit to computer-based recording. Give me a mellotron, a bottle of Finlandia, and some candles…and I’m one
happy Scotsman. If I do a hundred takes because I suck , it doesn’t matter. I want to know that I did that
performance on the fly and relatively in the analog zone. Purists? No. The composing / producing / performing
process is an expression and experience in itself. I want the music to wash over me as I play. Not point and click,
cut and paste, or edit. I think this is why my efforts have always been a longer journey than what it would normally
take. And, as I have stated above, this is how I work….and I like it this way. I don’t pump out ‘hits‘...obviously . I
create art…whether good or bad is up to myself and the listener.
I have about a 45 minute drive to and from my day job. I listen to mixes and take notes. Sometimes at the risk of
death. These winding North Carolina farm roads can be murder…lol. But, these are moments I can totally
concentrate on the music with my head totally free of distractions. Again, the process….I love it!
So, with learning and rehearsing stuff with CHERRY, doing some music with Matthew Shelly, work, and wonderful
indulgent divertimento, I arrive here. Some songs are easier than others….more immediate. Some are a royal
pain in the ass. Questions and decisions arise on whether to ditch some songs, that at the beginning, were
wonderful inspirations. But, now, are like the Arch Bishop of Canterbury…over-dressed and quite anachronistic.
You still believe in them. You want them to work, but they just aren’t there yet and may never be. It’s the
wonderful and privileged position of being a artists.
I haven’t blogged for the past 2 months because I’ve been busy doing what I’m blogging about…lol. I’m at the
process of musical layers and general arrangements in, what I hope, will be their final form. This sounds so damn
convoluted, I know. Unlike some of my more talented contemporary musicians, I take my time. I want to get to know
the song in its every detail and nuance. A mixture of intimacy, then separation. This keeps it fresh to my ears. I
can stand back and make good objective choices on the music. I have also spent this time with keyboards and
general ambience. Color and feel. Adding and subtracting performances to get the right balance. More vocal
ideas come to the forefront, especially backing vocals. A ‘call and response’ sort of thing, which I always love
hearing in other music. What has generally slowed down my productivity has been my computer that runs all my
keyboard, synth, and sampler programs that is out of commission due to a nasty-ass virus. I like to do my
performances live with as little editing as possible. I’ve been a slave to MIDI VST inputs on my main DAW for the
first time . Pushing the very limits of CPU. So, its been a bit of getting used to and I’m not sure I completely like it.
But, you got to work with what you have. Plus, this is how most producers / composers work anyway nowadays.
But, I’ve never been one to ride the crest of the latest and greatest procedures. Christ, it took me forever to
commit to computer-based recording. Give me a mellotron, a bottle of Finlandia, and some candles…and I’m one
happy Scotsman. If I do a hundred takes because I suck , it doesn’t matter. I want to know that I did that
performance on the fly and relatively in the analog zone. Purists? No. The composing / producing / performing
process is an expression and experience in itself. I want the music to wash over me as I play. Not point and click,
cut and paste, or edit. I think this is why my efforts have always been a longer journey than what it would normally
take. And, as I have stated above, this is how I work….and I like it this way. I don’t pump out ‘hits‘...obviously . I
create art…whether good or bad is up to myself and the listener.
I have about a 45 minute drive to and from my day job. I listen to mixes and take notes. Sometimes at the risk of
death. These winding North Carolina farm roads can be murder…lol. But, these are moments I can totally
concentrate on the music with my head totally free of distractions. Again, the process….I love it!
So, with learning and rehearsing stuff with CHERRY, doing some music with Matthew Shelly, work, and wonderful
indulgent divertimento, I arrive here. Some songs are easier than others….more immediate. Some are a royal
pain in the ass. Questions and decisions arise on whether to ditch some songs, that at the beginning, were
wonderful inspirations. But, now, are like the Arch Bishop of Canterbury…over-dressed and quite anachronistic.
You still believe in them. You want them to work, but they just aren’t there yet and may never be. It’s the
wonderful and privileged position of being a artists.
02/09/2009
There is always a concern whether or not the arrangement of a particular selection of songs (i.e. an album)
sounds the same or has the same feel. I realized listening through "the story, so far", that there is a common
thread. There is continuity throughout all the pieces of music up to this point. But, this is not surprising,
considering that all of these songs are coming from the same mind-set, disposition, and general emotion. The
main concern was the guitars. I had a feeling that the approach and execution of the rhythm guitar parts sounded
the same. Well, in my mind, they do. But, as I pull back in an objective frame of mind, they serve a common thread
that serves as glue to the similarities of emotion, vision, and feeling. So, I rest in quiet assurance that this 'sin' is
forgiven. Being a guitarist foremost, I am very sensitive to whether or not the guitar parts sound the same. As a
composer and arranger, I say 'so the fuck what!' It is the story I'm trying to convey. If it all sounds the same, then
so be it. It is the art that commands the feel. Not the intellectuality or logic. So here lies the balance of control and
obedience. So, next lies the piano arrangements and keyboard parts that act as a layer to the tunes. This should
be interesting because my main keyboard computer has gone on the 'fritz'. There may be a moment of silence as I
figure out what to do. I hate when technicalities dictate the flow of creative endeavor. Why I continue this torture I'll
never know!
There is always a concern whether or not the arrangement of a particular selection of songs (i.e. an album)
sounds the same or has the same feel. I realized listening through "the story, so far", that there is a common
thread. There is continuity throughout all the pieces of music up to this point. But, this is not surprising,
considering that all of these songs are coming from the same mind-set, disposition, and general emotion. The
main concern was the guitars. I had a feeling that the approach and execution of the rhythm guitar parts sounded
the same. Well, in my mind, they do. But, as I pull back in an objective frame of mind, they serve a common thread
that serves as glue to the similarities of emotion, vision, and feeling. So, I rest in quiet assurance that this 'sin' is
forgiven. Being a guitarist foremost, I am very sensitive to whether or not the guitar parts sound the same. As a
composer and arranger, I say 'so the fuck what!' It is the story I'm trying to convey. If it all sounds the same, then
so be it. It is the art that commands the feel. Not the intellectuality or logic. So here lies the balance of control and
obedience. So, next lies the piano arrangements and keyboard parts that act as a layer to the tunes. This should
be interesting because my main keyboard computer has gone on the 'fritz'. There may be a moment of silence as I
figure out what to do. I hate when technicalities dictate the flow of creative endeavor. Why I continue this torture I'll
never know!
08/16/09
Final recordings of vocals, various ‘colorings’ and pre-mixes were completed during a marathon recording session
that ended at 5:30 a.m. on Monday 8/10/09. With the aroma of blown-out candles and a finished bottle of cheap
White Zinfandel, I took a complete listen to the entire collection of songs, in order, that I have been working on
since February of 2008. Half sober, I listened with burned-out ears and exhausted mind. I was, quite surprisingly,
happy with the final results. More often than not, a smile crept to my face as I listened intently to the completed
songs for the first time.
This project had been a mixture of indulgence, procrastination, obsession, frustration, challenge, and yes…even
enjoyment. I love the fact that all the songs, when played in sequence, have a familiar feel to one another.
Reminiscent, at least to me, of Roxy Music’s ‘Avalon’… not in style or sound, but in feel and concept. Some songs
fell short of the mark. Others pleasantly exceeded expectations. The vocals were, by far, the most
uncomfortable…as usual. But, I hope the listener will forgive the countless ‘flubs’ and my less- than-perfect vocal
technique. Now on to final edits and mastering. Once this is done, which I’m sure will involve more ’tweaking’, I can
then go on to CD cover and web design for this release. All in all, I am both content and proud of this latest
effort. A personal journey through my eyes and the experience of others. Anais Nin and Glen Duncan were great
lyrical inspirations. How much we can learn from and relate to the stories of others. I am blessed with an open
mind and heart to receive these gifts from those greater than I.
Final recordings of vocals, various ‘colorings’ and pre-mixes were completed during a marathon recording session
that ended at 5:30 a.m. on Monday 8/10/09. With the aroma of blown-out candles and a finished bottle of cheap
White Zinfandel, I took a complete listen to the entire collection of songs, in order, that I have been working on
since February of 2008. Half sober, I listened with burned-out ears and exhausted mind. I was, quite surprisingly,
happy with the final results. More often than not, a smile crept to my face as I listened intently to the completed
songs for the first time.
This project had been a mixture of indulgence, procrastination, obsession, frustration, challenge, and yes…even
enjoyment. I love the fact that all the songs, when played in sequence, have a familiar feel to one another.
Reminiscent, at least to me, of Roxy Music’s ‘Avalon’… not in style or sound, but in feel and concept. Some songs
fell short of the mark. Others pleasantly exceeded expectations. The vocals were, by far, the most
uncomfortable…as usual. But, I hope the listener will forgive the countless ‘flubs’ and my less- than-perfect vocal
technique. Now on to final edits and mastering. Once this is done, which I’m sure will involve more ’tweaking’, I can
then go on to CD cover and web design for this release. All in all, I am both content and proud of this latest
effort. A personal journey through my eyes and the experience of others. Anais Nin and Glen Duncan were great
lyrical inspirations. How much we can learn from and relate to the stories of others. I am blessed with an open
mind and heart to receive these gifts from those greater than I.